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Tuesday, May 27, 2014

A Touch of Grey

So last weekend we stayed in Kansas City, or just outside ofit, and had a lovely time.  But there is one thing that happened that I have not been able to get out of my head.  It was a horrible reality check, a shock to the senses; it was a big, blinking sign in my face that flashed “YOU’RE GETTING OLD”.  Here’s what happened…..

We were very lucky to get a room, it was Memorial Day weekend and every place Wunder Hubs called was completely booked.  We were just about to give up when he got a room at the Super 8 in Bonner Springs.  They had just gotten a cancellation and gave us the room.  We were very pleased, the trip was back on.  We packed our bags for an overnight stay and headed out.  We decided to check in before we headed to Pizza West for dinner.  We unloaded the Kia, walked to the elevator and waited for what seemed an eternity for it to arrive.  We waited, and waited, and waited, and waited, we were to the point of going to the front desk to see if there is a problem with their elevator.  But just as we started to walk away we heard the “BEEP” signaling the elevators arrival. 

This is pretty much exactly what they had on
We turned and froze.  It was the Kiddo’s face I noticed first.  His eyes bulged, he blushed and looked at me then back at the elevator, then all around not sure where to look.  Out of the elevator came a shirtless man in leather pants, a bow tie and a fur scarf.  He was trailed by two girls in neon bikinis.  We all paused and looked at each other, then continued on our way.  But in that moment, the moment in which we all stopped and took in the presence of one another, the harsh realization hit me. 

I think what triggered the realization was not the clothing of the elevator skin tribe (or lack thereof).  But it was the way they looked at me.  I was able to see myself from their point of view.  And their point of view took my mental image of myself which looks something like this…..

Behold the thinnest I have ever been in my adult life!  This is 2006 Martie and how I often find my perception of myself mentally to look.  (if that makes any sense at all.)

And turned it into something like this…..
Hello children!  May I bake you a pie?
As we boarded the elevator, Wunder Hubs chuckled and said “Oh to be 20 again”. I gave a snort of a laugh in agreeance.  But my mind wondered, I was never that young.  Nope, not ever.  I went from child to housewife (you see my first marriage started when I was 17).  I cannot relate to these people in any way.  

And that felt strange.

Later we learned that the hotel was booked because of a Skrillex concert.  Thus the wildly funky cast of characters we continued to encounter at the Super 8.  Maybe he wouldn't see me as so old and lame if we met.....

"Hey Baby, I think your career development plan is HAWT!  Tell me more about your phat 401(k)"
So am I upset about being old?  No, not really.  Sure it would be great to be as fat as I thought I was in my 20’s.  And sure it would be nice to not have the aches and pains that I have now in my joints.  But I love my life, I love my Wunder Hubs and my Kiddo.  Life is more manageable now that I am nearing my *gasp* mid 30’s.  So I am not hep and trendy as the kids, that’s OK, I've got swagger.  

OK, maybe not, but I am comfortable with my place in this world and that has to count for something.  I will get by......


  1. Hind sight is 20/20.. I still need to lose 15/20 lbs but I'm not worrying about it... I feel great where I am... instead of making myself crazy and yeah... no to being 20... I loved my 40's... being 50 is pretty fabulous too... I don't care anyone thinks .. :-D